Magic and Love

The other day, Cookie and I were sitting at the counter chatting. Christmas was brought up and I made a suggestion for a family gift and I told her that her brothers wish list was already on the fridge. She stopped me mid-sentence, and said "Just tell me Mom". I looked her in the eye and said "Well, we could pick a different family gift if you like." She rolled her eyes and I knew my life was again about to change. The mommy in me wanted to cry. "Is Santa REAL mom?" she asked. I answered with "What?"
The conversation continued, she let me know that all the kids at school say that its just the parents. I asked what she thought. She didn't answer.
I looked at her and told her that I Believe in Santa. She wasn't so sure. I told her that I believe that Christmas is Magic. She said she thought it was the parents. I asked what parents were being her Santa, because I had no Santa Cash. But she wasn't wanting to be charmed, she was ready for the painful truth. So I gave it to her..
I let her know that Christmas is so much more than presents and things. It is the love we feel and the service we give. The Magic we create. I told her I will always believe in Santa, and all that he does for others. Do I believe he has a work shop with elves.....once upon a time! But now he can shop online so why work so hard! She rolled her eyes again. So I knew there was more. She asked questions... where do the gifts come from, when there is no Santa Cash in mom's bank account? Who wraps the gifts? How does it feel like magic? We talked. I was honest and loving.
The subject turned to the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny. She is older that her three siblings where when we had this same talk. She dealt far better than her siblings. She didn't cry, I don't think it even crossed her mind. We talked about how now it was her turn to share the Magic! That everyone gets to share.
She was astonished that it was her siblings that did the Christmas wrapping last year, and filled and hid the eggs at Easter. She said "They knew?" I said yes. She was amazed that they knew where the Easter eggs had been hidden, but they played for her. That they did the Magic for her. She asked how long her brother had know, I told her since he was 12. She said "They have been doing this all for just me all these years?"
I knew at that moment she got it. It wasn't a trick, it was Love and Magic. That her family, all of her family loves her so much that we all did the Magic for her. But yet we love and create the magic for each other so that it will be real for us as well. It was a great conversation. I cried, so did she, but because she felt loved. Then she asked that I not tell anyone that she knows. I asked her why. She said she likes being the baby and having everyone love her. I told her that will never change. But now it was her turn to help, to make the magic to share the love. She agreed. Yet she still isn't ready to let the other kids know she is big. And I am okay with that!!!