Loud

Why is it that when all is still and quiet,
the lonely screams so loud?

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

I never stop thinking about you, even when I'm concentrating on other things, there you are in the back of my mind painting big hearts all over the place!

There is a man....

There is a man, who I want to get to know better. He fascinates me. I could listen to him speak for hours, perhaps days. He causes me to think, to ponder. His wisdom is brilliant, although I am not sure he would see himself as such. I very much enjoy being with him. He makes me happy, he gives me goosebumps.
His wit is quick, and he is charming. He is quiet, reserved almost. The strong silent type?! I'm not sure.
I like this man.....I wonder if he knows.

True Oh So True....

Quote of the Day

Do you remember....

Do you remember the first time 

you held someone's hand?

I do, David Pooler. I was 10 or maybe 11. 

He had bright red hair (like Bryan Bingham's) he was a friend of the family. We were all playing cards. 

He held my hand under the table. No one ever knew, and it never happened again. 

But I will always remember. 

Fall.....

This is Fall in some Charming place!
I love it!!!

This is Fall in Phoenix.
Do you see the tree in the parking lot at my work....
the ONE that is turning red!

If Today is Your Birthday....

25 November 1966 ......You were born on a Friday, under the astrological sign Sagittarius. Your Native American Zodiac sign is Owl; your plant is Mistletoe. Your birth flower is Chrysanthemum. Your birthstones are Citrine, Yellow Topaz, Pearl and Diamond.

Born November 25 - Your Year Ahead
You are beginning a whole new "chapter" in your life story this year. Connections to others can be strengthened through acceptance and generosity. You can approach new projects with determination and passion. You can be especially enterprising and more courageous, and eliminating bad habits can be successful. However, you should watch for variable energy levels and a tendency towards self-deception.

If You Were Born Today, November 25: You are exceedingly charming--and some of that charm is quite kooky and endearing. You are a magnanimous person with a big heart. You're fun-loving, yet you are success-oriented at the same time. People trust you. Your jovial disposition makes you a pleasure to be around. Broad-minded, you seek truths without fussing over the details. Facts don't impress you as much as broader truths do. There is a spiritual side to you that is not immediately apparent. Famous people born today: Ricardo Montalban, John Larroquette, Amy Grant, Joe DiMaggio, Christina Applegate, John F. Kennedy Jr. Your Birthday Year Forecast: The New Moon Solar Eclipse in your Solar Return chart suggests that you will instinctively begin a new phase of your life this year. A decisively new direction has come about in your life. This can be an emotionally stimulating time in which you feel the urge to initiate and project, even if you are not quite clear about what you are projecting. Much of the energy in your life can have a magical quality to it as things are just automatically going in a certain direction. It is important to be intuitive at this time and allow the natural course to show you the way to the next step. Surprises (mostly very pleasant) pepper your year. New beginnings are in order, and you are bound to feel some level of excitement as the year unfolds. Uranus continues to transit in harmony to your Sun this year. Exciting (not jarring) changes and new interests characterize the period ahead. It's easier than ever to express your unique individuality, and if this involves changing careers or jobs, a new love affair, or an entirely new hobby, it's something that takes you forward into unexplored territory. You are more willing to adapt to new circumstances, ideas, and unfamiliar situations this year. It's a good time to join organizations and groups and to attend meetings or social events. You are able to find creative solutions to problems now. Flexibility is the key to success under this influence. Your personality is sparkling this year, which is sure to attract new circumstances and people into your life. Mars trine Jupiter and Pluto in your Solar Return chart strengthens you by infusing the year with enterprising spirit. This is a strong influence for professional as well as personal opportunities. Your faith in your ability to produce and to win takes you places perhaps never imagined. The energies of this influence favor negotiations, deals, legal matters, reasonable speculation, and travel. This aspect also favors positive outcomes in competitive activities, including sports and business, for example. You are more goal-oriented this year, as superficial goals no longer satisfy you. You want your objectives to reflect what you're really about, and you are likely to rid yourself of unsatisfying goals this year. A new project or goal begun this year has a good chance of being successful and long-lasting. Your sexual and physical activities tend to be more intense, passionate, and focused. It's an excellent year in which to make a lifestyle change, as your ability to concentrate on what really matters to you is enhanced. Pleasing circumstances surrounding your love life, finances, and creative pursuits are in store this year. You are more generous, and others return the favor. You might receive financial backing or special gifts in the period ahead. You seek a little more from your love life and you are likely to receive it. Some of you could fall in love this year, or existing relationships are enhanced. Adventure-seeking is a theme. You are certainly more imaginative and attuned to the world of beauty and romance. Gentleness with others is the best way to harness this energy and to attract what you want into your life. There could be truly "magical" times on a romantic and social level. You are especially romantic this year, and you are likely to idealize and expand a relationship through sensitive interactions and a more giving approach. Benefits come through paying attention to your dreams and intuitions, as well as through creativity. You are beginning a whole new "chapter" in your life story this year. Connections to others can be strengthened through acceptance and generosity. You can approach new projects with determination and passion. You can be especially enterprising and more courageous, and eliminating bad habits can be successful. However, you should watch for variable energy levels and a tendency towards self-deception. 2011 is a Number Four year for you. Ruled by Uranus. This is a year of work and development. It's "nose to the grindstone" time. It's a time to deal with practical matters, and it's not a time to be lazy or especially gregarious. Sometimes, it can be a year that feels hard, monotonous and routine, and/or lonely. Advice - get yourself organized, work to build your resources, keep busy. 2012 will be a Number Five year for you. Ruled by Mercury. This is a year of exploration and freedom. It's a time when exploration and reaching out to others brings opportunities. It's a good time to advertise and sell. Surprises are in store, and the routine is broken. This is a year when exciting relationships can be formed, or, if you are already in a partnership, new life is breathed into the relationship. Advice - explore, look for adventure, keep your eyes open for opportunities, mingle. Sagittarius Personality: Inquisitive and energetic, the Sagittarius is the traveler of the Zodiac. Their philosophical, broad-minded approach to life motivates them to wander far and wide in the search for the meaning of life. Extroverted, optimistic, and enthusiastic, it can be almost impossible to keep the Sagittarius down. They love change. In fact, change is essential for this sign to feel their best. Sagittarians are playful and love to have fun with their lovers. Passionate, expressive, and willing to try just about anything.When it comes to love, the Sagittarian is loyal, true-blue, and devoted. Mates for this sign need to be intellectual, sensitive, and expressive for the best results. As the key phrase for this sign is I understand, having a good sense of how their partner thinks is quite important. Whether it's stimulating conversation or a hike through the mountains, you can expect this sign to be surrounded by friends. Sagittarians are a ton of fun and downright wacky at times. They love to laugh and to get everyone around them going. Sagittarians make friends from around the globe, enjoying the various takes on life and culture. They're generous and are not ones to hold a grudge. Anyone who can sit a spell and talk about the deeper things in life will suit a Sagittarius just fine. They make friends easily and remain steadfast through the years. When it comes to family, the Sagittarius is dedicated and willing to do just about anything. Freedom and independence are extremely important for this outgoing sign. Providing these traits aren't infringed upon, all relationships go well. "Visualization" is the keyword for the Sagittarius. When this sign sees something as possible in their minds, they will go to great lengths to rally enough people to make it happen. Straightforward, they don't usually mince words about what they want, and they seem to know exactly what needs to be said in a given situation. They make excellent salespeople, and it's even better when this involves travel. When the Sagittarius gets a sense of the big picture, they'll work night and day to reach a goal. A variety of tasks and a dynamic atmosphere favor Sagittarians. Careers such as travel agent, photographer, explorer, artist, realtors, ambassador, and import/export trader all suit this free-spirited personality. Fun loving Sagittarians enjoy making - and spending - money. Considered the luckiest sign of the Zodiac, they don't worry too much about where the next buck is coming from. Sagittarians are risk-takers and highly optimistic, trusting in the universe to provide what is needed. Money-management tasks will bore the Sagittarius to tears, so getting a bookkeeper or accountant is the best plan in order to stay on top of what's coming and going. Sagittarius - The Personality Traits of an Sagittarius Young Sagittarians are happy and playful. They can be impulsive and will be the kind of child who says 'hello' to everyone, and will be despondent if others don't respond. Your child will be active and adventurous, rarely sitting still, but as a result may pick up more bumps and bruises than other children. A Sagittarian child enjoys company, but when left alone will be content hugging a teddy or blanket. Sagittarians are totally honest and expect to be treated openly and honestly in return. You may find that your child asks endless questions. Most Sagittarians enjoy learning but will take a dislike to any rules that they see as pointless. They are sociable characters who should be allowed to take any opportunity to socialise. Parents should not pressure a Sagittarian child or be possessive over her. A young Sagittarian child may hide her hurts and disappointments and should, therefore be encouraged to show feelings. Sagittarians are generous and parents will have to give guidance about money. These children are restless and freedom loving, but they may need to be taught that there are some social rules that must be obeyed for their own good. The typical Sagittarian can be a bit clumsy and will pick up knocks and bruises from falling over and bumping into things. From a health viewpoint, the typical Sagittarius may suffer from asthma. Uncommonly attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with its fate, can be egoistic, very reliable and trustworthy, faithful and prudent lover, sometimes brains rule over heart, but takes partnership very serious. Element:Fire Direction: South Color: Ebony Polarity: Yang Gemstone: Topaz Lucky Number: 8 Sign Order: Seventh Season: Summer Month: June Allies: Tiger, Dog Foes: Rat Western Counterpart: Gemini The popular and active Horse is the seventh sign of the Chinese Zodiac. These natives are independent and cheerful types who genuinely enjoy people. They can also be quite headstrong and when angry and are apt to act without thinking things through. These are the natural salespeople of the Chinese Zodiac. Their upbeat and physically magnetic nature combines with a love of thinking up new ideas. They love to help anyone and anything to get ahead, including themselves. Horses will do a good job. They want to succeed. Never underestimate a Horse native's power of persuasion. In love, the Horse can be a heartbreaker. They are easily attracted and may manipulate or flirt in a way that is most seductive. Unfortunately, some Horses prefer to play and value freedom above commitment. A Horse must be mature to marry successfully. This is a person who likes to have fun. Horses need physical activity and lots of variety. They are flexible people who do well with sudden changes and shifts of direction. People who like them must expect the same. Horse has a large circle of friends but, ultimately, they walk alone. A Horse is going to follow their own path, running free ahead of the herd. Positives:Magnetic, vivacious, witty, independent, cheerful, refined, enduring.

Q & A

Sometimes we get to see a glimpse of what others see in us or who we really are when we overhear ourselves talking. I listened to myself today and found out a lot about me.

Q. What times in your life have been the best?

A. They have all had their good points, but personally I am in the best time right now!

Q. Why do you think that is?

A. I am a priority for the first time in my life and I truly like me and I am happy.

Q. How did you get to that point? What changes did you make to bring you to this Happiness?

A. I view life differently now than I did before.
It's 'LIFE 101'! 

A class that will never end,
but will test you all the way through. 

It's not a pass/fail thing, it's just a daily class. 

Set your mind on being happy,
care for what you are responsible for. 

If you can improve something, do so!
If you can't...LET IT GO!

    I also believe in making a Bucket List.
Trying new things
and getting out of that comfort zone. 

Feel free to care, love, live
and experience at many levels! 

Make yourself a priority.
(If you don't no one else will.)

Find what you love and go after it. 

Then move on to the next thing you love...
repeat, repeat, repeat!

    Don't follow other peoples life rules,
it's your life, enjoy! 

Be who you want to be!
You are what you chose to be,
not just the individual pieces. 

(I am afraid, lonely and small.
But you will never see it.
Because I am so much more than that.) 

Fake it till you make it. Live the part.
Be who YOU really want to be! 

I found I need other people in my life.
I learn far better with others helping me along the way.

Q. Do you believe in God?

A. I had to find God on my own terms. 

That is difficult, and may take me a lifetime,
but I think it is worth it.

I spent the first 42 years of my life listening to
what other people wanted me to see God as, 

do what they say God says to do. 

I have talked to him. I know he is there. 

He made me in his image. 

Thus he gave me a brain to use on my own 

and choice to do with it as I see fit for me!

No matter where or how you chose to worship,

I feel that a relationship with God
is individual and personal
or it's Not Real. 

Drama in the Home

I was woke up yesterday to Cookie asking me to sign something. I asked her if she was really waking up for this, and told her I would sign it when I got up. In my sleepy head I started to wonder what was up. So I got out of bed, and on the kitchen counter was her report card, well just the envelope, to be signed. So I took it to her room and asked where the other pages were...like the grades!! She fumbled through her backpack, then dug through a drawer. To produce the grade report.
(I got a call from her math teacher last week about missing homework. We talked about it, it wasn't the first time though.)
As I reviewed the grades I was floored. Not one, not two but three F's. What the stinking hell?
Life as we know it stopped in my little house. It was in my face that I was failing as well. I am failing my kids. So I pulled myself together. Sat down and figured out a plan of action.
The consequence was she lost all phone privileges. New homework rules were implemented, and time guidelines. Chores were discussed and so was service. We need a family over haul.
All in all, lots of drama. The other parent isn't even in the book let alone on the same page. I will talk to the teachers today (it's not like she doesn't do the homework, she just doesn't turn it in.... Slight brain damage perhaps??)
Chore charts and calendars will be put into place this week.
The day ended far better than it started. But can I just say, parenting is so not what I am cut out for some days.    

Quote of the day

When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.  -Victor Frankl

Drama In The Home...

When I saw this saying

 I knew it was the one for my family today!

Quote of the Day

"i'm the hero of this story. i don't need to be saved."

Balloons!!!!

http://www.azballoonclassic.com/

These are an amazing hobby! I was surprised at how cool they are!!

Night time sky divers! They looked like commits!
This was very cool! 

Appropriate Thought For The Season...

Lasting Joy Is Found Not In What You Get, But In What You Give 

Boy Girl Dance

My Cookie is off to her first Boy Girl Dance!

It's a Black Out/Neon Dance.

She and all her friends were wearing black. 

(I guess the idea is like the laser tag place)

She asked me to help with her makeup, she

only fussed a bit when I helped with her hair. 

(she has amazing hair...when it's brushed)

She is at that place right between boys still

having COOTIES and

OH MY GOSH HE TOUCHED MY HAND!

I reminded her as she left to meet her friends,

that I was just her age when I had my first kiss. 

(7th grade....Paul Watson! *sigh*)

I wanted to take a pic of her before she left,

but I could tell I was walking that very fine 

mom line. So I will take one after. 

Proud mommy moment watching her walk down

the street to meet the friends. She is a delight.

I love love love her!

Breathing Deeply

I got a call from a very dear friend this past week. I have to admit I hadn't spoken to her in far too long. My reasoning was laim. I had put off contacting her because my life felt still. Yes there has been rocky terrain in my path in the last half year, but nothing big and grand. I didn't feel I was up to par with other peoples happenings.
When we spoke I learned that not all is glitter and gold. That perhaps I was better off being still and steady. I have been thinking I want the WOW factor in my life, but I must be honest with myself, I am the girl next door, far happier to be MaryAnn rather than Ginger (no subliminal message SM).
Yesterday I read a letter from an acquaintance, that reminded me that my life is good, my trials are small, and my life drama is manageable. The letter made me see, again, that each of us has our own rocky path to take. I am grateful for mine. For the choices, for the company, for the happy I am living.
I will continue to take a deep breath before each new fork in my life journey.
But I think it's time to redefine me, once more. Back to basic, back to being happy in my skin.

Step One,    Remember what is truly important. Make the people in my world feel they matter, because they do.
Step Two,   Recognize my Happy! Where I get it,what I do with it, and how and with whom  I share it.
Step Three,    Reconnect with who I am and who I am working to be. (I can honestly say I like me, I have flaws, but all in all, I am happy with who I am. Always room for improvement of course.)

So, although it sounds silly, I started a quilt....and a sewing project. Time fillers? Perhaps, but they make me slow down, they redirect my thoughts, letting me focus on the important and letting the world come to me, rather than me chasing after the sparkly things in life.

Breathing deeply.

Craig's List 101

Today I am going to learn all about Craig's List. I have a car to sell.
So... I have put my big girl panties on and I'm ready to take on a new challeng.
Wish me Great Luck!!!

Dragon Gloves

Alone

One of the hugest issues I have is being alone. Yet I seem to spend so much time there.
The harder I try to fill the time the more time I have there. I just don't know how to embrace it and be okay there. One of my great struggles in life, I suppose. The things I want most in life seem to be just out of reach. What lesson do I learn from this?

Always

Ummmmm.....Damn Straight!

Quote of the Day

"All a girl really wants is for one guy to prove to her that they are not all the same."
Marilyn Monroe

It Takes All Kinds!

I was running errands one day and saw this house. 

So as we were out and about this week
 I showed the kids. 

I am sure there must be no HOA in this subdivision. 

 The house is painted black, the fence is black, the blinds in the windows are black, 

the vehicles are even all black. 

It takes all kinds!!!

More Of My Favorite Things...

The kids and I went to the Coffee Cabin for our favorite Hazel Nut Hot Chocolate and then off to the Car Show at the Pavilions! I love spending time with my kids! They are some of my Favorite Things Too!

Like My Dog

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gtt2mSK0N4
by Billy Currington
There you go! 

It's a Mommy and Me Morning!

 Cookie and I are making
"Peach Muffins" "Chocolate Chip Muffins"

 "Blueberry Muffins"

                               "Sugar Doughnut Muffins" 

And Brother Is Being A "STUD MUFFIN"!!!

Her Smile

I

Love 

Love 

Love 

To See 

Her 

Smile! 

Hello......

Magic and Love

The other day, Cookie and I were sitting at the counter chatting. Christmas was brought up and I made a suggestion for a family gift and I told her that her brothers wish list was already on the fridge. She stopped me mid-sentence, and said "Just tell me Mom". I looked her in the eye and said "Well, we could pick a different family gift if you like." She rolled her eyes and I knew my life was again about to change. The mommy in me wanted to cry. "Is Santa REAL mom?" she asked. I answered with "What?"
The conversation continued, she let me know that all the kids at school say that its just the parents. I asked what she thought. She didn't answer.
I looked at her and told her that I Believe in Santa. She wasn't so sure. I told her that I believe that Christmas is Magic. She said she thought it was the parents. I asked what parents were being her Santa, because I had no Santa Cash. But she wasn't wanting to be charmed, she was ready for the painful truth. So I gave it to her..
I let her know that Christmas is so much more than presents and things. It is the love we feel and the service we give. The Magic we create. I told her I will always believe in Santa, and all that he does for others. Do I believe he has a work shop with elves.....once upon a time! But now he can shop online so why work so hard! She rolled her eyes again. So I knew there was more. She asked questions... where do the gifts come from, when there is no Santa Cash in mom's bank account? Who wraps the gifts? How does it feel like magic? We talked. I was honest and loving.
The subject turned to the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny. She is older that her three siblings where when we had this same talk. She dealt far better than her siblings. She didn't cry, I don't think it even crossed her mind. We talked about how now it was her turn to share the Magic! That everyone gets to share.
She was astonished that it was her siblings that did the Christmas wrapping last year, and filled and hid the eggs at Easter. She said "They knew?" I said yes. She was amazed that they knew where the Easter eggs had been hidden, but they played for her. That they did the Magic for her. She asked how long her brother had know, I told her since he was 12. She said "They have been doing this all for just me all these years?"
I knew at that moment she got it. It wasn't a trick, it was Love and Magic. That her family, all of her family loves her so much that we all did the Magic for her. But yet we love and create the magic for each other so that it will be real for us as well. It was a great conversation. I cried, so did she, but because she felt loved. Then she asked that I not tell anyone that she knows. I asked her why. She said she likes being the baby and having everyone love her. I told her that will never change. But now it was her turn to help, to make the magic to share the love. She agreed. Yet she still isn't ready to let the other kids know she is big. And I am okay with that!!!

CARPE DIEM

Today is that day.....
Yesterday  I went to see the doctor. I like to think I am on top of my health. But as I went for answers to an issue I am having, I came to the realization that I have neglected things I need to take charge of. There are things I have put off for far too long. So, although I did not get the answered to the questions I was looking for. I did take the steps to ensure that I am on top of my health care. Blood was taken, ultrasounds were viewed, and a mammogram was experienced. I was at my healthcare complex for hours, but I had the time yesterday to do that. Next week I will go back for my final test and consultation. I feel, until this current issue came up, that I am a healthy girl. But as I reviewed my care of me, I see that I have neglected and ignored some things that need to be addressed.
SO.....Today is the day. I have put down in writing the steps I will personally take and the goals I am after. I have made great progress in the past, its time to move forward again. As I have reached the point that I can say that I am truly happy with me, I can also say there is always room for improvement.
Maybe the issues that took me to see the doctor were God's way of saying "Take a minute, slow down, reevaluate. There are changes coming...take charge and enjoy." God and I are not as close as we have been in the past, but I still have a healthy respect and he still knows where I live. So as I prayed yesterday, I did something I had not done in a very long time. I prayed for me. I love the life I have, I am enjoying were I am at in it. It is time for the next step, a new path of sorts. Today is my day to begin.
I love a good challenge!
CARPE  DIEM ~ SEIZE THE DAY   

Stories for my children......

I used to tell my children stories when they were little.
Someday I would like to write them down and put them in print.
I would like my grandchildren to have them.
I even have a map of the stories...we all loved them.....I miss the kids being little!

My life........

Addiction? Yep!!!!

http://pinterest.com/frvesnt/

Need A Job?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/45101989#45101989

My cousin sent this to me. I wish I could pick up my world and move to ND, I would like a change.

Where your heart is...

Welcome to my world...every day!

Thought of the day...

Part of a Best Friends Job is To Clear Your Computer History if You Die!

I WANT TO SEE THAT.....

I WANT TO BE HERE WITH YOU BABE

Halloween 2011

My favorite Zombies....My Cookie was a Devil!!

1/4 of this stash was his, the other 3/4 was his sisters!

Super Cute way to tell the world!

The Captain for President!   He has my vote!