DREAMING

 I tend to have very vivid dreams. Details, colors, that sort of thing. I can normally remember pieces of my dreams, even though the logic behind them is pointless. Normally, like last night, someone I love is in my dream, the children in my adulthood are usually very young and the adults are normally those I love. Last night I was at a dinner party and Beth was 5 again. I knew everyone there and the busy conversations were happy and the tablecloth was pastel blue. I dream of people I know and usually places I am comfortable in, although my awake brain doesn’t know the places and the person in my dream may look like someone else… I knew who they were. Last nights dream was filled with happy chatter and hugs for people arriving at the gathering, I remember holding hands. It was a very happy dream. 

A couple nights ago my dreams were not as pleasant. I do not remember the dream, well a tiny bit at the end. I remember being frightened. It was dark and I couldn’t tell who was behind me, but I was trying to escape. I couldn’t move and something was keeping me from yelling. I was scared and was trying to scream. My screaming was muffled. I woke up John with my muffled screaming, but not myself. He woke me up, helped the dream to end as I fell back to sleep.  

Then I dreamed of a time when my children were young (always a treat to have my children little again). In the dream I remembered the actions of others impacting my children’s happiness. The self centered people that impacted my children. In this dream I remembered that it was a dream and I don’t have to deal with anyone’s gaslighting. But I was there in the dreamy drama and my children were dealing with the issue at hand. So I did what I would do when they really were that age and I tried to make things right, to make things happy. This dream reminded me that not only do I still detest people who made my children’s lives unhappy but I love each of my little ones so tremendously. 

I tend to dream about certain people often and many of my dreams are in the woods or by some body of water. I dream about details, like the blue tablecloth, pink wallpaper and a red cap. I have conversations with my dream cast, and usually we are all happy. 

Dreams keep our brains active and I know that I am blessed to have such an active imagination. Even though I don’t like the random scary and frustrating dreams, I’m always so glad I get to see the people who have made a happy appearance in my slumber movies.